A Little Friday Humor

Fat is Counter-Revolutionary

Struggling with your weight?  Turns out it’s a class struggle, my friend!

product_thumbnail.phpYes, that is a real thing.  And such a bargain, at a mere twenty capitalist dollars!  Order it here.

In case you’re wondering,

The book formulates a perspective where weight loss is treated as a political act against a consumptive, capitalist, culture of excess. All other diet books promise ‘beauty’ ‘beach bodies’ and such nonsense, this book however, argues that weight-loss should stem from a desire to live in a world where resources are shared by all. It categorically proves that one cannot lose excess weight and maintain a capitalistic hoarding psychology.

All of which seems a bit like overkill, no?  If Stalin’s USSR, Mao’s China, and the Kims’ North Korea are any indication, post-Revolution weight loss is pretty much guaranteed.

German Paper Warns of Coming Ice Age.  It’s funny because everyone knows we’re all gonna die of global warming.  Or that global warming causes global cooling.  Or something.  Because, science.

Speaking of science, here’s Beloved Leader Kim Jong Un proving that North Korea really is Vault 101 from the Fallout series of video games.

kimAnd yet somehow these guys have a nuke.  I especially dig the trac-ball mouse.  And because North Korea’s the nation that keeps on giving, here’s a still of the crack 4th Pajama Jammie Jam division demonstrating their deadly eyes-closed “spray ‘n’ pray” firing technique:

norks1It might be tough to see in thumbnail, but trust me,that dude in the foreground has his eyes screwed shut.

The cream of the North Korean navy goes through amphibious maneuvers:

norks2And last but not least, check out this elite regiment of… whatever the hell these guys are:

norks3I’m sure the Abrams boys are quaking in their boots.  If we have to fight them mano-a-mano while wearing 1920s college football gear, though, we’re in deep shit.

And here’s a MiG-21, which first entered service in 1959.

norks4Apparently the North Korean People’s Air Force figures our guys will be laughing too hard to pull the trigger.

And yes, these are the pictures of their military the Norks want us to see. It’s almost as if the state-controlled media is so in thrall to the Party that no information about the real world can ever penetrate to the top of the chain of command, for fear of upsetting their Beloved Leader’s cherished delusions and delicate emotional equilibrium.  Soooo glad that kind of thing doesn’t happen here in America, no?

Happy Friday, y’all.

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