The Pledge

As everyone who has seen The Prestige knows, the first part of a magic trick is called “the pledge.” Then “the turn,” and finally “the prestige,” the big payoff.

In a totalitarian society, the “news” often contains little more than “pledges.” Half the fun of reading Pravda back in the days was trying to spot the pledge. Since every story the State’s Propaganda Ministry puts out is overtly political, you know they’re going to do something with that seemingly mundane item about the new fishing trawler in Krasnoyarsk. Will the salted herring quota of the Five Year Plan be overfulfilled by 300%? Or is this a setup for something about the triumph of national minorities under the leadership of Comrade So-and-So, who’s now a comer in the nomenklatura?

I have to admit, my brothers, I’m getting one of those old Cold War chubbies right about now. For, you see, on the very same day Biden is installed, the WHO issues new COVID guidelines that will significantly reduce the number of new cases. As Internet people used to say, WATFO?

What Are the Fucking Odds. I mean, who ever could’ve guessed?

Nobody else gives a crap, but recall that The Media is deeply invested in “the first hundred days.” They have a bunch of those stories ready to go for every new administration. Recall also that Biden mumbled something about challenging everyone to wear masks for his first hundred days. Gosh, do you think The Media is trying to spot him a few points’ lead?

Just like that, somehow, someway… poof! A gazillion-percent reduction in new cases “in the first hundred days.” That ol’ Democrat magic rides to the rescue again. The only question now is, will they have the chutzpah to call it an Easter miracle?

I love clown world, I truly do.

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7 thoughts on “The Pledge

  1. DeaconBlues

    My son and I were joking about THIS VERY THING about 3 hours ago: now that Biden is in office, FAUXVID 19 will disappear like Kaiser fscking Söze. Tired of predicting the future while being facetious.

  2. ganderson

    OT, and crossposted from Peak Stupidity:

    …, but Justin Thomas is getting the two minutes’ hate for calling HIMSELF a faggot- apparently he left a putt short and, as Bob Dylan would say “muttered something underneath his breath”, like say, “ faggot”; and has been dropped by at least Polo, not that the ‘mos are lining up to wear Justin Thomas branded active wear, and is being forced to go to re-education camp. Maybe the camp was ‘his’ decision.

    Golfer’s are now on notice that such time honored golf chirps such as “your husband play golf, too?” And. “ you get your putter caught in your skirt? “ are now verboten.

    1. Severian Post author

      You’re surprised by this?

      One of two things must happen. 1. This stupidity has to burn itself out. Call this the “witchcraft trial” solution – those ended only when the elite started getting accused. 2. This stupidity is stopped. Forcefully. They appear to be doing everything in their power to provoke actual armed rebellion, and it’s only day 2. By all means, geniuses, push people’s backs against the wall. Hamfisted repression has worked out so well in the past….

      …. But Collectivists gotta collectivist. If they were capable of learning from the past they wouldn’t be collectivists.

      1. ganderson

        It’s just that this is SO stupid- even dumber than most of the normal idiocy. It does tie in with the notion that has been retailed here and many other places in “ our thing”, namely the forced acceptance of things that are either ridiculous, repugnant or both. I know, and you do too, that the youngsters are mire tolerant of …err … alternative lifestyles than guys my age, but I still believe that normal men of any age find the homos to be icky, and funny, at the least. But we pretend otherwise.

  3. wixwaxer

    You could see this coming from miles away – drop the Ct from 40 (!) to 30 and watch the false positives melt away. It’s a Joe Bai Dung miracle! Declare that lockdowns don’t work and we’re half way home. All that’s left is the covidiot mask of shame, but that’ll be gone too following the Pretender’s 100 wear-the-mask challenge. Hope the trail of broken dreams, shattered lives, was worth it to make the Orange Man go away…

    1. Severian Post author

      Of course, all that was a feature, not a bug – that’ll teach us Deplorables to know our place.

      I doubt we’ll even need to bother with the 100 days. Biden has already been seen violating his own mask order, and that Jen Psaki idiot, who spent the entire Obama administration saying the quiet part out loud, has excused it by saying “we have bigger things to worry about.”

      So there’s that. As I always tell the Covidians and Greens, I take this stuff EXACTLY as seriously as our rulers do. Obviously they don’t give a shit, Karen, and don’t you feel stupid now, you sanctimonious cunt?

      The Bidenreich isn’t ALL bad, in other words.

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